watching expired appliances align

cheap afternoon blogging stunt part 6

i think it's time for the conclusion of this afternoon diversion. i will end things letting you know that i finally received an email this afternoon. the subject line?

"Great deals on kitchen cabinet refacing!"

cheap afternoon blogging stunt part 5

i thought there would be something positive to report by this hour. alas, my email inbox is still set to empty. my mind begins to drift to baseball.

and moisturizer. the backs of my hands are a little crackly.

cheap afternoon blogging stunt part 4

the best part about "dating offensive 2005" is that i'm not going to be in town this weekend, or even thursday night. i must've convinced myself it would be okay to try dating on the internet again because i wouldn't actually be able to set up any dates.

cheap afternoon blogging stunt part 3

my inbox remains empty. i was certain that after making my dating wishes public, the responses to my responses would come pouring in. it seems by making a semi-joke out of the whole thing, i have destroyed whatever positive dating karma i may have.

these thirty minutes of waiting for some sort of notification by a potential mate have left me a shrunken man, no longer filled with hope. it's times like these when i think back to a lesson learned sometime during high school. or maybe late middle school. i think it was 8th grade, but i'm not certain.

imagine it's 1988 (or 1989) and i gather with a bunch of other kids outside the middle school early on saturday morning. we're loaded onto the typical bright yellow school bus and shipped thirty minutes to an indoor recreation center one county over. students from across the region are there. we are there to learn things about peer pressure and leadership. i'm sure someone received a grant. a lot of it probably went to photocopying costs, as i recall receiving a folder or a binder while there.

i only have two distinct memories from this day (other than the general feeling of hating it and feeling like i was wasting my time).

everyone was divided into groups and sent to different seminars. one of the ones i went to was lead by a police officer who had a huge table of bongs and pipes set up in the front of the classroom. i don't remember my specific reaction but i think it went something along the lines of "huh."

my other memory, from later in the day, involves a presentation to the whole group by a speaker who talked to us with some sort of straight-talk, up with people vibe. but he also reminded us who we should not be. he equated his little slogan with the car company, BMW. "you don't want to be a bitcher, moaner or whiner." i couldn't disagree, buried within my psyche - the part i tried to hide from my wannabe' tough exterior of the time - was the notion that i believe in the power of positive thinking. and that acronym, memory reminder, what-have-you stuck with me.

so, today, no more complaining about not having any responses to my email dating solicitations.

ohh, what am i saying? there's more to come! whining when done in a public forum is so much fun!!!

cheap afternoon blogging stunt part 2

this was written ten minutes ago with the title WRITE BACK! WRITE BACK! I BEG YOU!:

part two of my "dating offensive 2005" involves waiting for the responses from the three people i contacted on nerve. i sent them messages last night - before midgnight, even! it's been almost twelve hours. i certainly expected to see some sort of "hey, thanks for writing" message by now. obviously, i'm compulsively checking the email account that's linked to nerve's online dating profiles. i won't be logging on to nerve during work; i just want to know there is a message waiting for me.

the thing that didn't occur to me until now is that i only sent out THREE messages. that's hardly anything worth describing as a "dating offensive." it's more like a friendly re-introduction to the online dating world. one that i meant to take much more seriously than i am. but right now i am dating gung-ho (or so i'm telling myself). you know how writers sometimes tell themselves they need to write at least two pages per day in order to finish their books? maybe i should convince myself to contact three potential mates per day. ahh, there's nothing quite as exciting as treating the quest for love like a job!

and, lets continue being honest, "dating offensive 2005" started unsuccessfully in march. i had one good weekend that looked promising. it turned into nothing, except for a phone call that i promptly blew off. "i wasn't ready!" i now exclaim to anyone who will listen. yet, i see this woman's email address written on a post-it note on my desk every morning when i grab my keys and wallet and head off to work. i should contact her. what's the time limit? is it okay that it's been over a month since we talked on the phone? she didn't seem too receptive on the phone, but maybe my charming email skills will work in my favor?

and that leads to why i really need to prepare myself for "dating offensive 2005." i need to go back to dating/wooing boot camp. is HITCH out on DVD yet? i can't write a good, flirty email to save my life anymore. it used to be a skill i thought i possessed. that was a lie. or, i have lost the skill.

this is a start. admitting everything. getting it out in the open.

now i just need to save this, return to it three hours from now and try to figure out how to make it funny instead of sad.

cheap afternoon blogging stunt part 1

the following was written last night around 12:06am. the subject line was EXHAUSTED:

i just created a new nerve.com profile. and then sent out messages to people who have been on my hotlist for a day or three. now i know why i don't actively keep up with the internet dating - doing so is tough and take a lot of work.

LARGE SIGN of neighborhood change

just in time for your high school reunion
newjetta.com

some random links

recent del.icio.us links:

Saved by the Bell - Fans Up In Arms Over Manipulated 5th Season Cover Art!
Elizabeth Berkley is always the source of controversy!

Fredericksburg.com - Truck stop to close
Servicetown, near where I grew up, closing after 40 years (a rather comprehensive article)

Ducksnorts: Ducksnorts Unofficial Guide to San Diego Taco Shops
must remember this for the august trip to california

Inept but likable - Love That Gulager!
the best review i've seen of PROJECT GREENLIGHT (and who can resist calling out GULAGER?)

U.S.S. Mariner
a very fine looking seattle mariners blog (courtesy the black table baseball preview)

a look back at the past year in tv

earlier this week my friend phil emailed me with his 2004 - 2005 televsion season recap. i've posted it online for all to see. comments and discussion for the recap can be found on my dvr blog.

laid back good times people

Yesterday I received this email:

To: Marc
From: John G.
Subj: Pressed Sandwiches

Marc,

Hey my name is John and I saw your blog online. Funny stuff -even funnier pictures! You have a cool group of friends.

Anyways I am starting a fast-casual chain of Pressed Sandwich lunch places in Manhattan in September, and saw that you guys were enjoying some at
one of your get togethers. I'm curious for your opinions on them. Where do you get them? Do you think if there was actually a cool lunch place serving them
you would go? What do you like in them? I know this is random but it's worth a try, especially as you guys are exactly the type of laid-back good times people I
want to come into my place.

Sincerely, John

(you like that? Laid Back Good Times People (LBGTP). You can have that one I don't mind)

In regards to seeing talk of pressed sandwiches, he's referring to photos from happy hours in spring 2003.

Needless to say, I have already adopted Laid Back Good Times People as the name of one of my fantasy baseball teams (yes, there are multiple teams this year).

I'll admit that I am not the best demographic for a pressed sandwich. As has been well documented, I only like beef & bread (with maybe a dash of black pepper). That is my preferred sandwich - on some kind of not good for you bread. Making it hot is good. Making it flat and a little crispy is also good.

Because I like providing free market research services, I've posted John's letter here. I also sent out a preview to a few friends who are contributing some great ideas.

Slightly snark Jim chimes in:
"Tell him we'll go there if they have a sandwich called The Pressed Ham. And another one called Freedom of the Press. Lame puns are what it's all about in the casual good times fun lunch business."

Handwashings then suggests:
"How about a sandwich featuring all possible ingredients on the menu called Press Your Luck?"

And Apes realizes a good idea when he hears one. Upon reading The Wash's email he adds:
"that might be the best idea of all time. certain to get a blurb in Time Out
New York at the least."

Anyone have anything to add?

i'm moments from going to watch episode 3 of GREENLIGHT

Here are a few of my recent del.icio.us links:

Jimmy Page's Sweater Vest: A butterfly in the Amazon flaps its wings...
some talk of a new minor league ballpark for richmond, va

Undeclared - Apatow talks about music, extras, whether or not there will be a special edition, and whether the release is really in July!
i want it on cable and on-demand! i'm so greedy!

New (sub)Urbanism: Getting Around in Suburbia
with real trolleys you can just jump onto the sideboard, right?

music (for robots) - Smokey Turtle by EYEBALL SKELETON
i just heard this track on WXJM. there's nothing wrong with a good novelty song every now and again.