watching expired appliances align

just for the record, i am not a ben folds five fan, i just went for the zito factor.

I'm about halfway through this epic, and one question keeps popping into my mind. Why is your dad referred to as "Stone Groove"? Did I miss that part?

"During the National Anthem, Jamie held his little giveaway American flag and wondered if he had to look at the big flag in centerfield like everybody else or could he just salute the miniature one in his lap"

Dan - love the double-entendre!

Am I the only one that posts on this board? Anyways, I'm just so excited that I am in 2 different write-ups on this year's list regardless of the fact that I only attended 1 game with you. On the 7/24 writeup you mention the infamous "nap" game. I can't help but notice that you left out that Aman also napped with us as well. Unintenional slight? I doubt it!
Funny how you guys are polar opposites yet you can't find one offseason fantasy proposal you can disagree on. You're like the Simon and Paula of PGX. Or for you "The OC" fans, like the Caleb and Sandy of the PGX...ok, back to more reading....

thanks for shattering what would have been an otherwise productive day.
im about half way through the 2003 baseball review. great stuff.
unlike the strato writeups, i can make it through these. engrossing,
really. the 2003 review may be the best yet. is this related in any way to
sujan replacing washcloth as full time cast member? i dont know. when
are you going to make the leap to writing about your games concurrently
with the season? i think id like that.

im telling zubby you referred to him as a burnt out hippie frat boy.

speaking of zubby, redbirds are at home AGAIN this year for july 4.
that should be sufficient notice for you.

i think the highlight for me is the photo of the guy w/ the recycled "Bobby V./Art Howe" bag on his head. He hasn't even cut eyeholes b/c he doesn't want to see the game!!

Yo-
Why the constant digs? Yankee fans, then actual Yankees, then me, then my car. This is becoming an issue, Dan. One you should maybe talk to a therapist about. And Jeter swallows? I think it's fair to call you not a fan of baseball but instead just a hater of Yankees. Which is now turning into a hater of me. Fine. It'll be fun kicking your used-to-be-an-Oriole-fan-but-now-I'm-in-it-for-spite ass in fantasy.

Rob,

For the origins of Stone's Groove's nickname, check out my 2002 music writing under the Huey Lewis heading. http://balgavy.com/music/dan2002.html

As far as the nap game, I forgot that Aman was there. Really? Did he take a nap as well? Who are Simon and Paula.

Eric,

I hope Zubby isn't coming after me. Also, I doubt I'll be making it to Memphis this year for the 4th. Although, if you want to make it to Philadelphia for some O's- Phillies action, let me know.

Bart,

It isn't that I hate you, it is just that I hate everything you stand for, baseball-wise. If you are the one confusing the two, maybe you are the one who needs a therapist. If you beat me in fantasy baseball this year, I'll wear a Derek Jeter shirt to a Mets game next season.

hey
so i'm reading david foster wallace's "a supposedly fun thing..."
and his attention to detail and style of overexplaining every minute
occurence and specification in his essays, that makes you feel not only
as
if you're there with him but that you actually experienced it yourself,
reminds me a bit of your baseball stories. yours are not anywhere near
his
anal retetiveness but they are wordy and make you feel as if you were
there
for each game.
play ball!

april-i love the notes on what fans yell from the pink stockings to the
fucking queer line. real americana. i also enjoyed the bitter anger
towards
everything yankees. you seem to be getting angrier as you grow older
but
it's a funnier, more laser beamed anger that cuts through the bullshit
and
utterly decimates the target. i am a fan. jamie's "these are major
leaguers?" comment reminds me of the line in major league, "this guy is
dead."

may-favorite line so far "Daniel R. was super excited to have a picture
of
his girl, a legend, and Daniel R." love the comparison of explaining
the
game to a brit and a child. why did neopolitan as favorite ice cream
of
kris benson disgust plumley. disappointed in the pedestrian choice or
just
hates neopolitan? did i tell you about the mutant neopolitan my mom
bought
at her local no name supermarket? it had vanilla coffee and orange
sections, which is weird enough, but they put the coffee and orange
next to
each other. coffee, vanilla, orange could possibly work if you just
pick
two each time you eat but whose bright idea was it to have orange and
coffee
touch? as they melt in your mouth together, you realise that it is a
flavor
unlike anything you've ever had on your mouth before.

next installment-june and beyond
jeremy

do you think i yell too much at baseball games? i suppose it's not very lady-like.

let's get back to the action

june - craving a bobblehead seems sort of sad. what a truly horrifying phenomenon/worthless figurine. and the proliferation of them is overwhelming. i say no more to bobbleheads. i don't even like typing
the word. yick. if you had stolen that woman's seat cushion she would
have sucked out your soul. wagner is to the scorpions what chopin is to belle
and sebastian. i imagine them all as little frail humans with constant head colds and scarves wrapped tightly around their necks, slowly dying of consumption. Jamie doesn't need glasses but it is his dark secret that
he never learned the number system. if you think that "been there, drank that"
kid didn't mean what his shirt was preaching, you need to check out the film "Thirteen." it's a real eye opener. "fairweather yankee dickheads"?!? i suspect a bit of editorializing here.

july - your little one-act, "Two Angry
Southerners and an Angry Southerner’s
Son" rivals the best work of Tennesee Williams although you've got to find a
way to give "I haven’t shaved my pits today" lady a role. the idea of Bob Pollard on Punk'd has me spewing water from my nose. the dan of 95 would never have left zubby unphotographed. a beer per inning i can
understand but if you can't even drink a water per inning there's some serious
problem occurring. i love the sammy sosa photo and the creepy rest stop descriptions blew my feeble mind.

july part 2 - is the roger clemens vs. derek jeter hatred thing really a philosophical question? are those gene shalit impersonators holding up the
ed-dee signs in the cooperstown photo going to be in the wedding? if i got one of those 25 cent haircuts in burlington, it would have been the most i ever spent on a haircut in my life. interesting or depressing?

august - besides your hatred of the yankees, what do you and sujan have in
common? the story of the mumford 19th century game just blew my mind.
how did i not hear about this story until now? how many handlebar moustaches
were present? it's good to see violence against animals being encouraged in
the minor league circuit. handicapped people certainly do not listen to modern music. they listen to megaphone crooners through a giant ear cone. why so curious about the yankee/visa clear bag policy? what do you have to hide, raphael?

september/october - i'm starting to get baseball overload but i must
press on. wow, the world series near miss roundup was fun. it is odd that marc
beat you to the world series. i'm looking forward to his year end roundup
now that he's delving into the world of baseball fandom. creepy.

are you calling me sad, younger paquette? watch your back.

i'm not calling you sad, sujan, i'm calling you sort of sad.

this is war, sebastianbabydaddy, this is war!!!