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Friday night ended the way I thought it would. It was just the middle part of the evening that was unexpected, and, ultimately, depressing. But not so depressing that I couldn't recover from it. Why am I relating this story? It's just sort of blandly humiliating. While discussing movie-going plans with my roommates I was online, AOL Instant Messenger window open. Received IM from a young woman I'd chatted with this summer. She goes to college in New York. We spoke huridly for three minutes and then spoke on the phone. We agreed to meet (we'd never met in person before). It all sounded like a fun plan. My roommate was bummed that I wouldn't be going to the movie, but he was aware of my lack of action getting for the past few months and understood.

I was an unexpected bundle of nerves on the subway. Running ahead of schedule, I stopped off at a bar for a quick bourbon on the rocks. And a cigarette. One cigarette led to two. I walked to the meeting place. Chewed a stick of gum. Waited. Cigarette. Wait. Cigarette. Gum. Wait. Cigarette. Approach young woman who could be my online buddy. Are you ____? No response. Cigarette. Wait. Gum. Wait. Cigarette. One block walk to a pay phone. Leave message. Cigarette. Return. Wait. Cigarette. Leave another message (how lame am i?). Cigarette. Meet roommate at movie. What the fuck? Was the woman I approached the woman I'd agreed to meet? Did she see me smoking a dozen cigarettes and say "what's the deal with this guy? He probably smokes two packs a day." I don't smoke two (or even one) pack a day. I was just nervous. And I felt awkward.

And that's my story about almost meeting someone from the internet. I think all of us have our silly stories.