the shrewdness of apes

the wife and celebrated our 5th anniversary this weekend and got to cross a couple places of the "to visit" list as a result. one was intentional, the other quite by accident.

last night, for the official celebration, we trekked back to Manhattan for dinner at the Bridge Cafe - "the oldest drinking establishment in New York." this place had been on my radar since soon after i moved here, and apparently it was a favorite of former mayor Ed Koch. i don't remember when i first came across it, but i used to see it quite often from the onramp to the Brooklyn Bridge and i liked the idea of eating in the shadow of the bridge in a place that would recall centuries gone by. the atmosphere didn't quite live up to my imagination, but the ambiance was nicely cozy, especially on such a chilly, breezy night after a 10-minute walk from the subway. and imagine my delight when they had an extensive menu of whiskeys available from the bar (the long wooden bar itself being one of the older touches in the place along with a few old signs advertising 45-cent goulash and some lithographs of the opening of the Brooklyn Bridge). we never even saw the wine list. i had a Manhattan made with Michter's single-barrel rye while the bar made up a variation on hot buttered rum for the wife. off to a good start.

for our appetizers, i got the crab-spinach-artichoke fondue while she got the breaded, fried oysters. the fondue was awesome- like a great artichoke dip. the oysters were pretty good, too, though they could have benefited from a crispier coating. the main course presented a dilemma. the wife fixated on the diver scallops right off the bat while i wavered (no shock to anyone who has ever gone out to eat with me). the pork chop seen in the online menu was not listed, and i had talked myself out of the ribeye already. but that left the "famous" buffalo steak and two specials: a blackened grouper, and wild game sausage. the game in question turned out to be venison, elk and wild boar, and the accompanying sauerkraut and potatoes sealed the deal for me. again, i was thrilled with my selection, though we weren't able to definitively determine which sausage was which. they were all delicious. the scallops, however, also fell in to the "just OK" category, though the accompanying sauce was pretty tasty. for dessert we got a bread pudding and a carrot cake. the pudding came with a bourbon caramel sauce that made the whole thing. the carrot cake would have been better at room temperature, but was a nice rendition nonetheless. i capped the evening with a single malt Connemara Irish Whiskey that "peaty" only begins to describe. it was delicious and steeled me for the blustery power walk back to the subway. the less said about the young couple who were sitting across from us and may or may not have had a white limo waiting outside for them, the better.

when we got home, i got a small present - celery bitters from LeNell's (naturally). i quickly dashed a bit into a glass of seltzer and the result was what i assume a Cel-ray tastes like, though i've never had one of those. the only disappointment came when i learned that LeNell herself had been disparaging of my enjoyment of Jameson. now i understand that there is a world of whiskey out there, and i love that LeNell's carries a wide variety and that much of that variety is reasonably priced. i love to explore and experiment as much as anyone, and i've always had pleasant interactions with the folks who work there, so i'm willing to overlook this particular incident. but i don't always want to have to ponder over every sip (you could make similar analogy with microbrews vs. Yuengling or other mass-produced swill) so i will remind her that the store's phone number is (877) NO-SNOBS and leave it at that.

even after a solid night of sleep, i woke up today feeling none too hungry. the wife and i planned to head out to purchase our very own seltzer maker, but our preferred location was closed today for the Sabbath. so we set out for the second store on the list, albeit without calling ahead. as could have been predicted, that place seemed to no longer exist, so we decided to hoof it to yet another place, about 20 blocks away. as we walked along, we realized that we were in a heavily Jewish area, and that our chances of completing our mission were dwindling. our disappointment grew when we passed the (closed) Pomegranate supermarket that looked like it would have merited a stop. the store carrying the seltzer maker still existed this time, but was indeed observing its day of rest rather than engaging us in some down-and-dirty commerce. the final kick in the pants came when we saw a new Pickle Guys location, also closed. apparently, it would displease god to allow to me buy a freaking pickle on a Saturday. i think i broke at least 3 commandments expressing my displeasure at this turn of events.

all was not lost however, for we realized we were in Midwood, home of DiFara Pizza - a scant 5 blocks from where we stood (also home to Oh Nuts, a mas favorite (and thanks to him for the address assistance), but another Saturday casualty). so off we went. it was about 2:45, it was crowded up front, and i was finally getting hungry. it took many minutes to get our order placed (regular pie with anchovies), but there was an available table, which we were all too happy to grab. we were prepared to wait, and it took about 45 minutes for our pie to appear. to this point, we have both been proponents of Totonno's in Coney Island, so we were anxious to see how this stacked up given all we had heard over the years. we definitely weren't disappointed. everything tasted great, from the tangy sauce to the creamy cheese to the salty, salty anchovies. the crust was a winner as well, and useful for mopping up oil and topping spills, though it might have benefitted from another minute or so in the oven - it was still very light colored with almost no char whatsoever. the fresh basil is always a welcome addition - one of the reason i love having Waldy's around the corner from my office. i packed three slices away and could have done a fourth, but was talked down by my better half. it's sitting in the refrigerator right now calling out to me. it probably won't be long now. that said, and knowing that char levels can vary from visit to visit, neither of us was prepared to knock Totonno's and its coal-fired glory from the perch at #1. something about the total package there just can't be touched. not that we've tried every possible contender. we'll need to make a pilgrimage to Staten Island some day. and another one to New Haven. maybe even to Trenton. but the best part is that there is no right answer, and we win just by playing. now if you will excuse me, i have a toaster over to preheat.

Posted by Jamie at 09:16 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

by the standards of chain restaurants in malls (not a high bar to set, i'll admit), Buffalo Wild Wings delivered the goods on Saturday. things got off to a bit of a slow start when we had to wait about 20 minutes only to get shoehorned into a space too small for our entire group. but they did have that bar trivia that's always a crowd pleaser and goes a long way toward redeeming the character flaws of the genre. plus, we had a good waiter which is key with a large party in settings like this.

after an adjacent table was procured, the parade of wings began with 12 of the Blazin' variety. Blazin' is the hottest of the 14 sauce flavors and they run a contest around it - if you can put down 12 of them in less than 6 minutes you get a free t-shirt and a Polaroid up on the wall by the entrance. the 6-minute time frame seemed pretty generous, but we wanted to see just how hot these things were going be. the waiter gave the standard "you sure you want to do that?" response, and i was expecting them to produce a face-melting, instant pain. but there was no waiver to sign, and 5 or 6 people gave them a try and no one thought they were unbearable. they were hot for sure, but it was much more of a slow burn that lingered but was definitely manageable even without the bleu cheese. emboldened, Brooklyn Viola decided to take the challenge while the rest of the 200 wings and assorted fried foods began to stream out of the kitchen. i recall there being onion rings, mini corn-dogs, buffalo chips (big fried potato rounds), fried mushrooms, and chicken fingers going around at the very least.

as stated in this space, my goal was to put away 32 wings to commemorate each year of my presence on this earth. i was pretty confident that i could do it and maybe even surpass it. i had resolved to resist the temptation of the celery and bleu cheese (which i love almost as much as the wings) and all the other fried goodness, and i fared reasonably well with this goal. the celery seal was broken fairly early on due to the first 3 Blazin' wings, but when the batch of 50 Hot wings arrived it was eyes on the prize. other flavors arrived in smaller batches, and pretty soon the gluttony was seriously under way. all in all, i tasted 9 of the 14 sauce flavors in various quantities. the Mango Habanero may have been my favorite of the exotic varieties. with about 20 people chowing down, there were piles of bones, napkins, and celery and ramekins of dressing on every available surface. i think just about every one of the 14 sauces was consumed at some point or another by someone.

this picture does not do justice to the carnage that was wrought

after a short time, Viola's challenge arrived and we all slowed down to watch. working steadily and methodically he left no doubt as to whether he was up to it, devouring all 12 wings in about 1:45 without any breaks for liquids or other analgesics. based on casual observation of the wall of fame, that would seem to put him in the top 10% of eaters at the Brooklyn location. he claimed his t-shirt, posed for his portrait and joined the other brazen Blazin' consumers (potential YouTube coming here).

with the bones amassing and appetites waning, my tally sheet showed that i had consumed 28 wings (plus some celery, a mushroom and a few Buffalo Chips). pretty good, but a little short. another order was going to be necessary and i was feeling good enough to contemplate taking the Challenge. caution won out, however, and i just ordered another 12 in Hot. this proved to be a prescient move after my stomach began to realize the amount of food that had been put into it, not to mention the 2 large beers. by the time they showed up (after the 3rd beer had arrived), i was looking forward to putting down 4 of them in short order and calling it quits. which is exactly what i did, passing the leftovers down the table where they were quickly demolished. but i met my goal. here's how it broke down:

the tally sheet - surprisingly stain free

i always appreciate a bar that has large sized beers. in this case you had the option of a 22oz. draft, though i do have to deduct points for the lack of pitchers - really you're a sports bar in the mall, how can you not have pitchers? a few people decided to go the fancy drink route, including Drummland who was putting back Mai Tais, Long Island Iced Teas, and i don't know what else. even so, he was still going strong several hours later. in the end, the tab seemed pretty reasonable given the size of the group and the quantities consumed.

Drumm doubles down on the Mai Tais

so could i do better than 32 and hold my own in some sort of competition? yes and maybe. without the beer, celery, et. al. and just focused on wings i don't think 50 would be out of the question. i'm not so sure how i would do if speed were necessary, but i think next time i'll give the Challenge and go and see how i do. i don' t know if i need such a large audience for that, though.

many thanks to all those who came, to the wife for putting this together, and also for baking the awesome lemon pound cake for dessert.

Posted by Jamie at 10:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

some slightly old - but still disheartening - news:

Washington Mutual will start charging fees for non-WaMu customers at their ATMs. turns out that offering this service for free served only to create longer lines at its ATMs which had the opposite of the intended effect by causing delays and annoyances for its actual customers. this provides an excellent opportunity to dig out a quote from a few years ago to make them look hypocritical: "'Consumers are tired of being nickel-and-dimed by banks, so we're saying the buck-fifty stops here,' said Tony Manisco, senior vice president and group manager for Washington Mutual retail banking in Illinois. 'We've opened 60 locations in Chicagoland since mid-June with ten more to come by year-end, so it's getting easier for people to find a safe haven from nuisance fees other banks are so fond of.'" but wait, i'm still tired of being nickel-and-dimed by banks! oh well, at least i have my offshore accounts.

meanwhile, planbreaker passed along the sad news recently of the impending demise of Vanilla Coke. my love for this product was borne of its seemingly remarkable effect on hangovers, but i think that conclusion was based on a too-small sample size and my consumption has mirrored the overall downward trend for the product. still it shipped 35 million cases in 2004 (down from 90 million in 2002), which you would think would be good enough to keep it around but you would be wrong. has it come to this? a product that sells 35 million cases can't even be considered to have a niche? don't hold your breath on seeing Raspberry Coke in U.S. stores any time soon. this is another example of Americans getting the shaft variety-wise. i know that's bullshit for the most part, but there are significant categories of products available in places overseas that are not offered here for reasons that aren't clear (cf. kfan's rant about KitKats).

at any rate, the passing of this once-revolutionary tonic will no doubt merit little critical discussion and won't have the nostalgic irony of a Crystal Pepsi. it will however soon be replaced in grocery aisles by Super-Ragin' Berry-Blasted Mountain Dew: Special Victim's Unit or some such.

on the topic of soda, i've been experimenting with making my own ginger ale recently and hope to have a D.I.Y. post about that at some point.

Posted by Jamie at 12:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)

despite all that 7-11 can be seen to stand for, i love Slurpee. they're one of the few things that make the fetid air of summertime bearable. but living in New York means a stark lack of access to these icey (not ICEE) delicacies. previously, i was aware of only two 7-11s in Brooklyn, both in Bay Ridge. both are near subway stops, but that seems too far to go for something that costs less than $2 and making it a car trip also seems a bit ridiculous (not that i haven't done it a couple times recently). then i saw the sign on 23rd St. in Manhattan a couple weeks ago and was ecstatic that i could pick a Slurpee within a 10 minute walk of work, and possibly on my way to the Shake Shack for lunch. this is the first Manhattan location, but some playing around on the store locator showed me that there are nearly 40 7-11s in New York City. Queens leads the way with 20, while Brooklyn has 9, Staten Island 5 and the Bronx 4. many of these are in the far flung neighborhoods past where the subways run, thus explaining the general ignorance toward the greatness of Slurpee in the five boroughs. the first report i've heard on the new location is that the Slurpee machine was not working, so they may need a few weeks to work out the kinks. i only hope that the Manhattan rents don't lead to some sort of $5 for 32 oz. price gouging.

personally i gravitate to the fruity versions and away from the cola and "light" flavors, and i'm an inveterate mixer such that the blues, purples, yellows and oranges have coalesced into a brown soup by the time i get to the bottom. i was particularly fond of the recent Fanta Tangerine-Orange flavor, but i'm not sure why they've decided to call the grape flavor "Gully Washer" for a limited time. still, it's delicious.

at any rate, the version i got today (Mountain Dew and Gully Washer mixed) came in a cup that offered a free download from iTunes as part of a 40th anniversary of Slurpee celebration which is great, but how do you pick just one song to download? i suppose i could use it towards a larger purchase, but my decision-making matrix became victim of a brainfreeze when i went to make my selection. maybe i just need to have 9 more so i can download a full album - that seems like an attainable goal.

on the Slurpee website there's a small trivia quiz where i learned that Winnipeg, Manitoba consumes the greatest amount of Slurpee drinks (i assume per capita). that's totally going to be on Jeopardy! next week. maybe it's a great winter drink too.

Posted by Jamie at 04:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

the problem: clogged shower drain caused by hair that is falling out (mine), of significant length (the wife's), or over-abundant (mine, everywhere but head).

manifestation: water becomes ankle-deep before you can even get a lather going. further details redacted in the interest of good taste.

attempted solutions: in the past, Liquid Plumr and the like have been the go-to remedies for such a problem, but even these high-test chemicals sometimes require multiple applications before getting the job done. in the interest of saving a few bucks and reducing the amount of toxic chemicals in our home, i started looking for a more natural, holistic (read: hippiefied) way to achieve the same results. several sites claimed the old science fair standby of vinegar and baking soda would do the trick. i meticulously tried to get the baking soda into the clogged drain before pouring the vinegar over it, though it's easier said than done. even so, this worked fairly well the first couple of times, though the clog never fully cleared. with diminishing returns setting in and water-levels rising near flood stage, it was time to find some sort of alternative. a little more research and a trip to Whole Foods resulted in a purchase of Earth Enzymes, a biodegradable clog eradicator.

final resolution: i came home with the new product, only to find that the wife had already bought and applied some Drano to the problem. after her shower, she pronounced the results to be "super". final test on hold pending further hair emigration.

total cost: about $9 - a couple bucks for vinegar and baking soda and $6.99 + tax for the Enzymes (after $1 coupon printed from website).

bonus feature: Drano (in crystal form) mixed with a pregnant female's urine can be used as a baby gender predictor, though for obvious reasons it is "not recommended".

Posted by Jamie at 10:36 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

good news for Brooklynite fans of good, cheap Cuban food and renewable energy: Soho's Cafe Habana is opening a solar-powered outpost next weekend on Fulton Street in Fort Greene. according to the press release, the space will be multi-functional, with indoor and outdoor areas, a flea market, outdoor movie screenings, DJs, etc. and the word i got from someone involved in the project is that this is a temporary endeavor that will act as a placeholder for the site while a bigger project (also designed with sustainability in mind) is developed. i'll probably try to get the wife to come along for some grilled meats and corn if any current or former area residents are inerested in joining us.

***UPDATE*** Habana Outpost: Brooklyn got a writeup in the free Brooklyn 24/7 paper over the weekend (under the terrible headline "Filet O' Sol" - what the hell does that mean? it's not a fish joint, nor Irish), which led me to the restaurant's website which has much more detail about the project.

meantime, a posting on eGullet about a weekly, A to Z restaurant tour of Manhattan got me thinking about an equivalent tour in Brooklyn. what restaurants should be included? while not economically feasible in reality, here's a selection that i would be very happy with (with some 2nd choices in parentheses) that includes a variety of cuisines, a few cheap eats, and at least a modicum of geographical diversity. have i missed anything obvious? i couldn't come up with anything better than Nathan's for N, but at least that's an institution, while the only U i could come up with is the long-closed Uncle Pho. X is just a lost cause.

Al di La (Alma)
Blue Ribbon
Convivium Osteria
Diner (Di Fara)

Continue reading "viva el sol; eating the alphabet" »

Posted by Jamie at 01:27 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

coming on the heels of last week's beer-related banter, Slate published a piece on how beer sales are lagging for the largest breweries, with Anheuser- Busch down 2.7% from a year ago and Molson Coors down 2%. the causes are laid out as follows:

[breweries are] facing the same difficulties as other manufacturers. Costs for raw materials and energy are rising, and they're having difficulty passing costs along to consumers. But beer companies are also butting up against some powerful demographic and cultural trends that may flatten sales for years to come......Americans increasingly tipple with wine and hard liquor. Health-conscious baby-boomers, fretting about waistlines and heart murmurs, are eschewing high-carb beer for cardiac-friendly merlot (or, post-Sideways, pinot noir). According to the Wine Institute, U.S. wine sales have risen smartly in recent years, from 558 million gallons in 2000 to 627 million gallons in 2003. Meanwhile, the young and hip�traditionally the biggest consumers of beer�are looking for harder stuff. Club-goers want less Molson Ice and more Maker's Mark.

that's all well and good , but their leaving out the obvious effect that my Bud boycott is having. now that i'm on the anti-Molson bandwagon as well, it can only be a matter of time before i have the whole malted-barley-and-hops industrial complex on it's knees. in the meantime, i'll happily stick with the Brooklyn family of beers (they're 100% wind-powered, y'know). no word yet on whether this news will bring the WhiskeyDrinker out of self-imposed blog exile.

Posted by Jamie at 11:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

in the Sartre-adapted movie of my (after)life, i am forced to spend all eternity as a "Secret Agent" in the Girls Intelligence Agency. one look at the about us page should tell you just about everything you need to know. i made the further mistake of delving into some of the message boards. it's really all too horrible to even contemplate - using the lure of free stuff to put tween and teen girls to work as pawns in the marketing and advertising of fads and novelties for the gain of capricious corporations whose goals are to turn kids into unthinking ultra-consumers rather than critical thinkers with opinions beyond which hair care products are the best. i'm not naive enough to think that we can rid the world of advertising and marketing or that they serve no useful functions (though it's sometimes hard to see what those are when you've just spent 30 minutes removing spam comments from your blog), but this shit is just egregious. i'm gonna have to produce an extended Bill Hicks rant to cleanse the palate:

"By the way if anyone here is in advertising or marketing... kill yourself. No, no, no it's just a little thought. I'm just trying to plant seeds. Maybe one day, they'll take root - I don't know. You try, you do what you can. Kill yourself. Seriously though, if you are, do. Aaah, no really, there's no rationalisation for what you do and you are Satan's little helpers, Okay - kill yourself - seriously. You are the ruiner of all things good, seriously. No this is not a joke, you're going, "there's going to be a joke coming," there's no fucking joke coming. You are Satan's spawn filling the world with bile and garbage. You are fucked and you are fucking us. Kill yourself. It's the only way to save your fucking soul, kill yourself. Planting seeds. I know all the marketing people are going, "he's doing a joke..." there's no joke here whatsoever. Suck a tail-pipe, fucking hang yourself, borrow a gun from a Yank friend - I don't care how you do it. Rid the world of your evil fucking machinations. I know what all the marketing people are thinking right now too, "Oh, you know what Bill's doing, he's going for that anti-marketing dollar. That's a good market, he's very smart." Oh man, I am not doing that. You fucking evil scumbags! "Ooh, you know what Bill's doing now, he's going for the righteous indignation dollar. That's a big dollar. A lot of people are feeling that indignation. We've done research - huge market. He's doing a good thing." Godammit, I'm not doing that, you scum-bags!

"Ooh, the anger dollar. Huge. Huge in times of recession. Giant market, Bill's very bright to do that." God, I'm just caught in a fucking web! "Ooh the trapped dollar, big dollar, huge dollar. Good market - look at our research. We see that many people feel trapped. If we play to that and then separate them into the trapped dollar..." How do you live like that? And I bet you sleep like fucking babies at night, don't you?"

Posted by Jamie at 01:25 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

since we're in the middle of Brooklyn Restaurant Week (priced at $19.55 in homage to the World Champion Dodgers of the same year), now seems like an appropriate time for some food-related items.

in a sign that gentrification is coming to our not-quite-Park-Slope, not-quite-Sunset-Park purgatory, we got our first non-Latino, non-pizza, non-crap-Chinese restaurant in the form of Bar BQ, located on 6th Avenue at 20th Street - too new even for any Google results. as the name implies, they serve up a more-or-less traditional selection of meats (only 4 for now, with the menu promising more choices soon) as well as 4 standard sides: mac 'n' cheese, potato salad, coleslaw and baked beans. the meat all came without sauce, but the table was already equipped with several brands of hot sauce and two homemade sauces: a thin, vinegar-based spicy sauce and the chef's special house sauce, which was thicker, more tomato-ey, and sweeter. the wife got the brisket, while i opted for the pulled pork. each came with two sides for about $10-$12 and while she seemed to like hers a bit more than i liked mine, both were of a decent quality. certainly not the best BBQ i've ever had, but they got some of the little touches right, like the plastic lunch trays and the white bread. the homemade sauces were good, the sides didn't embarrass themselves and the prices were reasonable. the only major glitch was our waitress who, while very nice, was a bit inattentive and, well, let's just say that our bill came with a $10 error in our favor, which we had to wait 15 minutes to point out to her. her reaction indicated that the error was not terribly surprising or upsetting to her, which led the wife to say more than once "at least she's pretty". even the bartender didn't ask to pour us another beer when he came to borrow some condiments, though he had to reach over the empty glass to grab what he needed. still, we were happy to say that we had someplace within a 5-minute walk of the apartment that we wouldn't mind returning to. besides the Dunkin' Donuts/Baskin Robbins.

then, taking of advantage of the restaurant week pricing (which i promptly ruined by ordering multiple tangerine margaritas), we also made our first foray to Alma, the much ballyhooed Redhook Mexican joint. we were lucky enough to get a seat on the enclosed, heated patio that still afforded a great view of downtown Manhattan, and they even thought to include mirrors for those who have to sit with their back to the cityscape. while munching on the complimentary chips with two salsas, we perused the the 3-course prix fixe menu which was nice and varied. i started with the chicken flautas which came with a delicious avocado-based accompanyment that was way more subtle than most guacamoles, and much better for its simplicity. the wife got the ceviche - also done well though it contained only shrimp with none of the red snapper or scallops the menu had promised. for the main courses we selected the tuna steak (medium-rare) and the chicken enchiladas respectively. the tuna was well cooked and came flanked by a spicy, gingery sauce that almost had me asking for a spoon. her enchiladas were enough for two meals and contained a cheese that i can only describe as the most sublime cheddar cheese ever (though it was most certainly something else). dessert was no let down either. count me among those who really enjoy Steve's key lime pie. the ancho chocolate cake was less a cake than a torte and could have used a bit more spiciness for our taste, but was still enjoyable. since the regular menu looked good and of a reasonable price structure, we'll probably try to head back when we can enjoy the patio in all of its fresh-aired glory.

the coming week promises a few more gustatory ups and downs: on the plus side, we'll head to Thomas Beisl where i may be persuaded to try the braised beef cheeks. in the negative column, the wife will be attending Monday's party to celebrate the soon-to-open Bar Americain - better known as Bobby Flay's newest entry into in the New York dining scene - without me. apparently her VP of sales takes precedence over her husband when it comes to lavish work-related functions with impossible-to-crack guest lists.

Posted by Jamie at 04:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (12)

t.s.o.a. rarely throws it's weight behind many products, but in all the hysteria over the iPod Shuffle (i'm not linking to that, i'm sure there's about 137,624 blog entries about it alreday) i almost missed the rolling out of the Mac Mini which has to be one of the most genius moves Apple has yet made. the article in yesterday's Circuits section didn't even mention it until over halfway through. but a $500 Mac? with a 40 GB Hard Drive, enough RAM for most people and CD burning capabilities? totally unbelievable. and you can double the hard drive size and get a fast processor for just $100 more. and have you seen it? it takes up the space of about four pieces of bread and it weighs only slightly more at 2.9 pounds. how much easier is that to cart around than a laptop? granted you need to have access to a monitor, keyboard and mouse and that gets into the drawbacks, but for the most part you can use any existing items you already have with it without having to necessarily buy new ones. the only other significant drawback that i can see is that it only has 2 USB ports, but a $40 USB hub can solve that problem if applicable. there's also the issue of software, but it comes with a lot of good stuff and how many of you paid for that copy of Photoshop or Microsoft Office on your computers right now anyway?

i've been a Mac supporter for quite some time (really, let's not have that argument. Windows certainly has its advantages and its good points), but never to the point that i would chastise someone for buying a PC. but now, if you can get a computer that looks great, is totally unobtrusive, with an incredibly stable OS on a platform that is almost totally free of viruses and spyware (though those threats are sure to increase if marketshare does) at the same price point more or less of the Dells of the world, i don't know how you can make another choice. actually i do know, but i can no longer condone it.

perhaps Britt Daniel will get royalties from every sale

Posted by Jamie at 11:58 AM | Permalink

it's common knowledge that most fruit candies are not flavored using actual fruit and thus end up with some bastardization of the flavor that can range from that godawful fake chemical banana taste used in Runts to the room-enveloping grape of a piece of Hubba Bubba. so it was with some amazement today that i bit into an apple and realized that it tasted like sour apple candy. in a good way. this wonder of nature is known as the Pink Lady and is available at Rossman Farms (quite possibly the cheapest produce in NYC) and other fine grocers.

Posted by Jamie at 11:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

one story that's been rather quiet what with all the fighting and electoral fraud is how the onslaught of hurricanes this fall decimated Florida's tomato production resulting in prices that have tripled in the past few months, leading to this hilarious tidbit:

McDonald's says it could implement rolling blackouts of salsa at its mexican style Chipotle chain.

no word on whether there will also be brownouts (redouts?) of ketchup and BBQ sauce. does McDonald's actually put a slice of tomato on any of it's sandwiches? outside of the McDLT, i can't think of one that has it. which is too bad because it's the one thing they could serve you that might serve to counteract the havoc that the rest of their menu can play on your body.

still, none of this explains the price hike at Crif Dogs where the prices listed on the website have all been raised by $0.25-0.50 despite the fact that most of the offerings are tomato-free. as a result, today's lunch ended up being a bit pricier than anticipated, and that was without having one of their newly offered beers. now an inflation in pizza prices would make sense, though Slice has been quiet on the subject. perhaps that's because very few parlors actually use fresh tomatoes, opting instead for the canned versions that are more resistant to price fluctuations.

Posted by Jamie at 06:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

bibimbop's comment in the previous entry had me frantically searching to make sure Anheuser-Busch hadn't cornered the market on pickle production in this country. fortunately they do not (gullible i know), but the Vlasic website contains this interesting tidbit about the origin of their stork mascot:

1974 was also the year a wisecracking Vlasic Stork flew out of America's television screens with the message that crunchy "Vlasic is the best-tasting pickle I ever heard!"

In any case it worked, and while baby booms have come and gone, the Stork continues to stay with us as the fun Spokesbird of our fun brand.

there's also some Vlasic boxer shorts that went straight onto the Christmas List.

meanwhile, the first result of a Google search for Claussen pickles brings you to David's Pickle Page. not only is David a bit misinformed (he claims that the 3 kinds of pickles are Claussen, cooked and deli), but he's either a liar or lazy. his claim that "I will be upgrading this page regularly" [emphasis his own], is contradicted as the bottom of the page reveals that it was "last updated: 8-19-95". well, i'm sure he'll get his act together for the big 10th anniversary!

meantime, i'm getting all my pickles at Eagle Provisions in Brooklyn, where they make them in house and their fresh kielbasa is outstanding.

Posted by Jamie at 12:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

my year long boycott of Yankee Stadium will end with the season, and even though it cost me a chance to go to Game 6 of the ALCS, it felt worth it to avoid a place that's rarely been enjoyable for me over the years. but now that the Yanks have been vanquished, it's time to move on to something else. fortunately, last night's game gave me the perfect idea for the next boycott.

Budweiser commericals have been prevalent during the baseball playoffs, especially the spot where Joe Buck takes on the "slam-a-lama Ding Dong!" slogan as a way to capitalize on licensing money. pretty funny. then there's the spot where the "spoiled" baseball player lounges in the on deck circle on his cell phone while negotiating for a bigger payday for some promotion or other. he even waves the next batter towards the plate saying that this will "take a while". the ridiculous lampooning of today's crass, cash-motivated athlete is pretty harmless, but during the 8th inning last night, while the game was in progress (pitches were being made!), Fox cut to Chris Myers in the outfield "interviewing" the actor from the spot - as his fake commercial persona - while a troupe of females in "Slam-a-Lama Ding Dong" shirts lurked behind them smiling and waving perkily. totally classless and unacceptable. save that shit for something other than Game 3 of the World Series or at least do it when there's no game action taking place.

since i needed to work up some animosity towards this terribly boring Cardinals team (who's the most colorful player on this team? Julian Tavarez?) and a Fox boycott will most certainly not work, hello Anheuser-Busch boycott! this will be a little bit harder than i thought since it means no Budwesier, Michelob, Busch, Natural Light, Hurricane Malt Liquor, King Cobra Malt Liquor, Bacardi Silver of any kind, Tequiza or RedHook can pass my lips until November 2005. sadly that means i may be forced at some point to drink something made by Coors in the next 12 months [*shudder*] but hopefully this will simply be good news for the Yuengling and Molson companies. i haven't yet decided if this means my retro Bud pint glasses will also head into the closet for the duration.

Posted by Jamie at 01:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (22)

if i'm on your holiday shopping list (and really, shouldn't i be?), here's the perfect gift idea: the National Beard Registry t-shirt!

it will go perfectly with the Neuticles apron i may soon be wearing. for ordering info, contact me in this space.

Posted by Jamie at 10:51 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

as the price of oil rises above $50 per barrel for the first time ever (disheartening quote of the day: "'The market is looking for a new equilibrium point and no one knows where that will be,' said Jamal Qureshi, an analyst at PFC Energy, an oil consultant based in Washington. 'We still have a way to go. I wouldn't be surprised to see $60 a barrel.'" runner up: "At the same time, demand for oil is running at a pace not seen since 1978."), i happened to come across a short article from an April Herald-Tribune that made a lot of sense:

The best way for our government to create jobs is to provide incentives -- via the profit motivation -- for people and companies to start businesses. The next economic boom will need the start of a new industry....A great possibility for the next industrial boom is in alternative-energy research....Instead of spending on Mars programs, the government should sponsor and stimulate research to develop the technology needed to make hydrogen our primary fuel.

who can i vote for to make this happen? oh right...nobody. it's almost enough to make me take a hammer to the next Hummer i see on the streets of Brooklyn. idiots. for more info on why oil is going to be contributing to world volatility for years to come, read about The Big Rollover.

i may talk more about this later, but China recently set their first fuel-economy rules that totally put any regulations in this country to shame, despite the protests of auto makers.

Posted by Jamie at 06:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)

i always love the redesign of currency (though i will continue to fight for the eradication of the penny). perhaps it's not as exciting as coins minted with silver recovered from the World Trade Center, but the US Mint today unveiled it's new nickel re-designs for 2005. there's a new, more detailed mug shot of Jefferson on the front that takes up the enitre left side, pushing the motto to the right, while a script "Liberty" appears to be wafting from his lips. there a two versions of the back, one a pretty standard buffalo shot, the other a "depiction of the western waters as first viewed by the Corps of Discovery in November, 1805".

all in all i think it looks pretty good and i look forward to them rattling around my pockets for years to come. but why did they put the "Ocean in view! O! The joy!" line on there? it seems superfluous, quite a bit dated, and has far too many exclamation points for legal tender. i can only assume that it's a quote from Lewis & Clark's diary or somesuch, which is all well and good but how about a cool slogan like "54*40' or Fight!"? now that would look good on a coin. come to think of it, so would James K. Polk.

Posted by Jamie at 03:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (30)

while every wedding i've been to in recent years has been just unbelievably fun, there's a part of me that gets bothered at times about the exorbitant amounts of money that are often spent on them. now i know a lot of this has to do with tradition, family expectations and the desires of the bride and (to a lesser extent) groom, so i don't begrudge people for that. what really gets to me, though, is the ridiculous inflation that the wedding industry gets away with. and it's everywhere from the catering to the facilities to the flowers to the dresses. i can't tell you how many times i've heard in recent years someone say "this place charges $X to be rented out for a wedding, but they only charge half that for other events" or things in a similar vein. and that's just preposterous, devious and shameful. but nowhere is this practice more prominent than in the diamond industry, which is supplied with a constant stream of customers who have been told that a diamond is a required purchase and they have to spend several paychecks on one. meanwhile, the whole market is being artificailly manipulated to keep demand high and supply low. i was reminded of this by today's edition of The Straight Dope, the inimitable column written by Cecil Adams for decades now and the original purveyor of answers to challenging questions and debunker of urban legends. below are some excerpts from today's column:

Diamonds are a con, pure and simple. The topic is vast, so we won't discuss worker exploitation or for that matter "blood diamonds" used to finance African wars. Instead I'll focus on whether diamonds are worth the exorbitant sums charged for them. Answer: Of course not. Prices are kept high by a cynical cartel that preys on vanity and stupidity.

....[T]he world diamond market is largely controlled by a single private enterprise, the South Africa-based De Beers cartel. The geniuses behind De Beers recognized early on that a stable, profitable diamond industry depended on controlling both supply and demand....It sets prices arbitrarily and cuts off supplies to dealers who buy through unauthorized channels. On the marketing side, De Beers hired advertising firms, starting with N.W. Ayer in the late 1930s, to render axiomatic the idea that diamonds = true love....The campaign worked--U.S. wholesale diamond sales increased from $23 million in 1939 to $2.1 billion in 1979. The J. Walter Thompson agency performed a similar miracle in Japan in the 1960s, essentially creating a tradition of diamond engagement rings out of thin air.

bonus link: some really terrible lyrics from a song called "Coal to Diamonds"

chorus:
to my face you're precious as gold
but i turn my back and you're just like coal
even through the tears, oh i see
what you really think if me

Posted by Jamie at 11:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

while reserching the previous entry, i came across this article from a May 2001 Brandweek magazine concerning PowerAde and their attempts to wrangle more market share from Gatorade, blah blah blah. among such advo-babble as "Coca-Cola earlier this month pledged to turn up the volume for its sports drink" and the nausea-inducing fact that they had budgeted $60 million for the campaign, they interviewed a brand manager from the company. 4 months later, there's no way he would have gotten away with saying this:

"We're going to war. We will have an air attack and ground attack. If we just do a ground attack we will get annihilated from the air. We have great grass roots properties. [Gatorade's] going down."

does it shock anyone else that people get paid to care about this garbage?

Posted by Jamie at 03:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

i was quite late joining the cell phone game, but i couldn't pass up a free phone from work - the first phone i've had since the gigantic Nextel phone i got from a previous job in 1998. but apparently, lack of experience did not disqualify me from playing "lose your phone in a cab late on a Friday night". given that the phone was about 3 years old, it wasn't a huge loss (i mean really people, how many of you needed to point out the low-tech nature of my phone, or say something like "wow, that's just like the first phone i ever got"?). but i was surprised at how quickly i felt a bit lost without it, not least of all because of all the numbers stored in it. so how nice it was, then, to arrive at work today and have a new (hopefully free) phone waiting for me. it's pretty much the same phone in a lot of ways, but it vibrates, the screen lights up in blue and the games are slightly updated so i suppose we'll call it an improvement. now for the arduous part: putting all the numbers back in, picking a ring tone (maybe the JMU Fight Song?) and establishing a new high score on the "Snake" game.

Posted by Jamie at 05:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

so you ignored that feeling in your gut and went to see "The Day After Tomorrow" anyway didn't you? and as you stumbled out the theater, your face a rictus of pain, your disbelief still suspended, perhaps you were racked with guilt as you went to gas up your H2 about the fragile state of the planet's life-support systems? i mean, what can i do as just one person to really make a difference? here are the two simplest actions i could find:

1. become a Republican (note: only applies to non-Republicans)
2. buy some Compact Fluorescent light bulbs. we recently picked up our first 8-pack at Costco for like $20. to quote the Department of Energy:

If every household in the U.S. replaced one light bulb with an ENERGY STAR qualified compact fluorescent light bulb (CFL), it would prevent enough pollution to equal removing one million cars from the road.

they can cost up to $5-$10 a bulb but they do last forever (5+ years), they reduce your electric bill and you can always take them with you if you move.

so did anyone also go see Soul Plane? is it worth checking out or is the presence of Tom Arnold enough to impugn the whole thing? i enjoyed the ability to customize the plane's features through the website. my favorite combination was 5-5-1-2.

Posted by Jamie at 05:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

in more Brooklyn-centric news, the Times has an article today on planned renovations at the Atlantic Center , Bruce Ratner's monstrosity on Atlantic Avenue and potential neighbor of his new basketball arena. it's getting some new signage, some awnings and a new paint job to make it more shopper-friendly and so it will more closely resemble the new Atlantic Terminal project that's set to open later this summer (which, while not exactly the homecoming queen, is far easier on the eyes, though it does block the view of the Williamsburg Bank Building from the south).

t.s.o.a. was sort of shocked a few days back when we noticed that the scaffolding around the Terminal project was largely gone, opening up the sidewalk for the first time in years. more exciting is the revelation that, after years of speculation, Target will indeed be the retail anchor of the building. full disclosure: the wife and i are registered at Target for our upcoming wedding ceremony.

Posted by Jamie at 12:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

among numerous advertisements that have been bothersome recently (really, could Applebees possibly get more annoying?) is a billboard ad i keep seeing for Jaguar, the luxury carmaker. next to a picture of one of their sleek but still rather ugly cars it says:

Born With: 390 Hp
Lives For: Mach .21

now i realize that the average person is not necessarily the target for this automobile, but there's a few things wrong anyway, even overlooking that the car is technically not "born" nor does it "live". first off, the measurements are given in units that virtually no one can attach any real meaning too. 390 seems like a lot of horses, sure, but how does that compare to the Nissan Sentra that just cut me off? and i know that Mach 1 is the speed of sound, which must be pretty damn fast, though who knows exactly how fast. but the use of a decimal represents another problem. not only does it mean that people are being asked to adjust the value of something they're unsure of, but they're being asked to do it by a factor of less than 1, which serves to diminish the impressiveness of the feature. if i were to call myself .02 of a millionaire, that would just sound rightfully ridiculous.

so what does Mach .21 mean in everyday terms? a quick Google excursion tells me that it equals 71.4609 meters/second. all well and good, but yet another conversion will be needed - even if we used the metric system - in order to put that into the terms usually associated with car travel . fortunately, the good folks at Iowa State have a conversion table that tells me to multiply by 2.24 in order to get miles/hour. finally we arrive at their intended message: this car wants to go 160 mph (i've rounded the decimal down). that's faster than i've ever gone in a car, and i'm pretty sure the NHTSA would probably frown on enticing people to go so fast, which is probably why they've chosen such a roundabout manner of expressing this idea in the first place. wouldn't a direct approach be more effective, something like "Damn... this car is fast, beeotch!"? why go to so much trouble to play up a feature that most consumers would never be able to take advantage of?

click here for an interesting page about why speed limits should be abolished. oh, the speed of sound is about 761 miles/hour at sea level, and considerably slower at higher altitudes

Posted by Jamie at 06:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

it may be bad form to return from a vacation-induced hiatus with a commerical, but whatever - i can eat Doritos again! in recent years, i've developed some annoying if not life-threatening allergic reactions to MSG, which most of the Dorito flavors are swimming in. couple that with the fact that they were also dense with the dreaded partially hydrogenated oils, and my diet had been Dorito-free for some time (Tostitos, with their very short ingredient list, are another story).

enter new Naturals from FritoLay, made with natural ingredients - even organic ingredients in some cases - and so clear of MSG and trans fatty acids. i found these on the way to the in-laws in Ohio this weekend and ended up buying the White Nacho Cheese flavored Doritos. i was worried and half-hoping that they would be disgusting just so i could cross them off the potential purchase list for future lunches and road trips. but no. the taste was dead on; not as piquant as the regular variety but suitably salty and cheesy. gone was the devilishly orange color of the old guard which, while pleasing to the eye, tended to end up crusted on one's fingertips and under one's fingernails until tended to by toungue or napkin. there was still some residue left behind by each handful, but it was certainly less obvious. and the price seemed to be right in line with the rest of the options, so there was no sacrifice to be made there. they tend to test market these things in the Midwest, so i haven't seen them in NYC yet, which is the only thing preventing me from buying some tonight on my way home.

no word on them from Taquitos.net yet, but i'll certainly add my $.02 there when the opportunity arises.

more info on why trans fatty acids are really bad -which is scarier when you start looking at labels and realizing how many things they are actually in - and MSG allergies.

Posted by Jamie at 04:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

Brooklyn is always up-to-date, unique and unmistakable. Brooklyn is an exclusive part of the young people’s world; it rejects rules and conventions to become a synonym for freedom and independence.

this is gum they're talking about?

check out the stills from the Mentos-style commercials as well.

Posted by Jamie at 04:34 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

seafood from a chain restaurant. does it get any better than that? it does when Long John Silver's decides to give away free shrimp on May 10th. that's right, one giant shrimp (measuring about half a foot) per customer. and the kicker? they're doing it to celebrate the discovery of the former large body of water on Mars. t.s.o.a. hereby recants any and all criticism of the Mars rovers - free shrimp for all! unfortunately, they don't have anything as good to wash it down with as the Lobsterita from Red Lobster.

meanwhile, check out the Lobsterita blog, run by some girl from Utah who steals gummy bears from her job. there's a great link to windup sushi (paging youthlarge...) and multiple pictures of Rivers Cuomo should you be into that sort of thing.

UPDATE: check out the press release from LJS about the event, featuring such memorable lines as:

"NASA is making history on Mars and Long John Silver's is making history here on earth," added [Chief Marketing Officer Mike] Baker. "Our faith in NASA has paid off. Their giant accomplishment calls for Giant Shrimp."

and

[LJS President Steve] Davis ended the letter by writing, "This is one small step for man, and one giant leap for Giant Shrimp." He also again expressed interest in Long John Silver's becoming the first seafood restaurant on Mars.

is Mars already open for franchising? did one of the rovers find an empty Starbucks cup in a crater? the mind boggles.

Posted by Jamie at 04:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

here's an example where transparency serves an actual purpose rather than simply being a marketing gimmick: clear duct tape. and if it really does last 6 times longer than the gray stuff, so much the better.

Posted by Jamie at 05:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

i know what you're thinking: Mother's Day is a mere 25 days away, and I haven't a clue what to get for dear old mum! well fret no more, my possibly British subconscious, because there are now two (count 'em) t.s.o.a. approved ways to please your mom or anyone else you happen to owe your entire existence to.

first, the wife and friends have put their French Culinary Institute (motto: needs more butter) training to work with a luscious menu that's so good (and baked) you won't want to give it away. so order one for yourself too, you selfish bastard.

now, another talented friend has launched the website of her gift basket business. the stuff is good and she's got the testimonials to prove it (a couple are even from people i don't know!). so order now, now, now!

Posted by Jamie at 02:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

it's about time: Brooklyn finally gets its first Restaurant Week. $18.98 gets you a 3-course meal at a litany of fine dining establishments all over the borough. t.s.o.a. can highly recommend the following: Rose Water (Park Slope), Madiba (Ft Greene), A Table (Ft. Greene), Superfine (DUMBO) and Relish (Williamsburg). at the top of our list of places to check out are Alma, Thomas Beisl, Miss Williamsburg (which jumped on the list after seeing their lasagna on Tyler's Ultimate the other day), and Downtown Atlantic.

also, Coney Island officially opened over the weekend. the wife and i will be braving the projected cold weather to ride the Cyclone if anyone else feels up to the trip. a stop at Totonno's could be in the cards as well.

Posted by Jamie at 12:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

t.s.o.a. is dusting off the rarely used product endorsement shoes this morning to extol the virtues of Spybot Search & Detroy, a terribly helpful program that fixes a lot of problems caused by the rampant internet surfing anyone reading this is obviously engaged in. making it even better is that it's free and it kicks the crap out of AdAware and any other program someone might dupe you into paying for. if you're bothered by excessive pop-up ads, if your computer has become slow for no apparent reason, if you've had your home page hijacked or if you've found weird programs running on your computer, this program is really worthwhile. even if you haven't noticed anything untoward going on, you'd probably be surprised at what's been buried deep within your cookies and registry. i run this program on all of our computers in the office and have recently used it to help out some friends who were having problems.

quick instructions: download the program; donate a nominal amount if you're feeling nice; run the installer, then start the program (you'll have the find the English flag to get it in the proper language); before you hit the "check for problems" button, use the "search for updates" feature and install the updates that it finds; now run the problem check and when it's done (2-10 minutes depending on your machine) tell it to fix the problems it found. you can get more information about what it finds if you're curious. i also recommend running the immunize feature, which will help prevent problems down the road by blocking products whose intentions are less than honorable.

feel free to e-mail me with any questions you might have.

Posted by Jamie at 11:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)

why haven't i been eating more cuban sandwiches? two kinds of pork, cheese, pickles and mustard served hot on a nice crusty roll - could there be a more perfect ingredient list? i'll answer my own rhetorical challenge by saying: there could not be. the one i had for lunch was even light on the pickles and it still caused a head-slapping like questioning of my very gastronomic existence to this point. the main problem is that they're not terribly common, but i will now make it my mission to search them out and find a couple that are worth going back for time and again. i shall also try my hand at making my own. today's offering from Havana Pies on 23rd Street gets a B-.

also i realized today that i haven't had a vanilla coke in a really long time (and still never tried the vanilla pepsi). having been won over by its mysterious hangover-curing properties the first time i had it, it became a staple in the beverage stable for over a year. but it's been losing ground steadily to fruit juice and the sparkling sodas from Mistic. so the main question is whether there will be a renaissance before it gets pulled from shelves completely. since i never see anyone drinking it anymore and you can't get it in restaurants (even fast food places), i can't see it hanging around indefinitely.

lastly, i finally made it to Hinsch in Bay Ridge on Saturday for an old fashioned soda counter experience. my milkshake and the wife's ice cream soda came to $7 and were both highly tasty, though the ole stomach was in a bit of disarray later in the evening.

Posted by Jamie at 05:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

we recently found a list someone had made in which they outlined things they wanted to do at some point in their lives and we'll post it as soon as we can find it and type it in. apparently the BBC has a show called 50 in which they list 50 things to ___ before you die as voted on by viewers. perusing their list of 50 places to see , we were appalled that Florida/Disney somehow was #3, ahead of Macchu Picchu, the Great Wall of China and Yosemite National park among others. what a crock - is absinthe really making that big of a comeback over there? as a drunken Bart recently spewed, "PPhhloridas sshteribble! Gaaah!"

don't miss your chance to vote for the food everyone should eat.

Posted by Jamie at 07:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

the orange soda taste test is now online exclusively at balgavy.com. in a similar vein we found this 2-year old pizza taste test from Slate today.

and courtesy of Jim, fun craigslist job postings:

* become A-Rod's (?) personal assistant

* become the Cyclones mascot!

* operate an elevator (must provide own uniform)

Posted by Jamie at 03:12 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Sour Starburst, where have you been all my life?

Posted by Jamie at 05:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

honey is constantly being added to products that need no improvement: mustard, wheat bread, ham, butter, cough syrup. sometimes, i just want a plain ham and cheese sandwich, or some regular mustard to dip my nuggets into. honey is fine for tea, or even pancakes, but please keep it out of my lunch.

and did you know that pastrami and corned beef are virtually the same thing? hell, i didn't even know pastrami *was* beef until a few months ago. i just assumed it was pork, but as it turns out it's the nitrates that cause it to become pink.

Posted by Jamie at 02:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (12)

isn't Nads simply the best name for a product ever? especially one that promises very painful hair removal? the site claims that it "looks like green toffee and can be used anywhere on the body.....just smooth on the gel and remove it with linen strips." oh, those wacky australians.

Posted by Jamie at 05:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (14)

just got off the phone with the wife, who told me that was the amount of the check that arrived for me today from the Attorney General for the State of New York. this represents my share of the payout from the class action Compact Disc Minimum Adverstised Price litigation that accused and convicted the major CD companies of fixing prices in the 80s and 90s. all you had to do to stick it to the man was sign up on the website last year and affirm that you had bought at least one CD during the period in question. i had all but forgotten about this, but now i'm rolling in dirty corporate money! i hope there's a check waiting for you when you get home.

in other good news, 50 degree weather is coming to NYC.

Posted by Jamie at 05:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

as many of you know, t.s.o.a.'s quality of life greatly improved the day we found out that our company let employees borrow company cars for weekends. for only $25 for the whole weekend (+ gas, tolls, etc.) we can avoid the wait for buses and escape the rest of the ants burrowing through the underground tunnels. for a new yorker, access to a free or cheap car when you need it can be invaluable. it's especially handy when you live out in the boonies. not only can you escape the city, but you can stock up on groceries, haul a group to the bowling alley, take the dog to the dog park, and just generally live it up. that they don't have to be returned with a full tank of gas is a major bonus in these days of serious oil price gouging. while the natural shortness of the weekend (with the occasional 3-day variety thrown in) limits how far you can drive and still get back by 9am monday, i've managed to complete successful hauls to D.C., Philly, Vermont, Boston, and even Pittsburgh over the past couple years.

now, these company cars are not the most stylish things on earth. the company needs them to be functional first and foremost and because we're an evironmental organization, things like gas mileage take precedence over form and color. for a while, we had one the gas-electric hybrids which was great and even moderately sporty. unfortunately, a co-worker totaled that one late last year (he was fine, and our insurance covered most of it), leaving us with nothing but a fleet of minivans available. but dammit, i love those minivans, even the one with the radio that doesn't work.

they're reliable - in the thousands of miles i've logged, the broken radio is as serious a problem as i've encountered. (yes, that first trip to Pittsbrugh was a little dicey, but that Aerostar has since been retired).

they get good gas mileage - trips to DC and back usually require only 1 fill 'er up if there's a full tank when we set out. average cost <$25 if you can get it oustide a major metropolitan area - oddly, the NJ Turnpike often has the best gas prices, even if they won't let you pump your own.

they're roomy and comfortable - it's always nice to be able to fit five or six people without making them submit to contortions. there's plenty of room up front for storage/drinks/CDs. and the high seats make you feel like you have a better view and are safer, even if that's an illusion.

they lack flash - especially important for those like me who live in the area 10-20 mph above the speed limit. cops are seriously more likely to pull over cars and trucks that look like they *should* be going fast. seems like the cars i usually see pulled over are BMWs, Miatas or bloated SUVs, while the police give me nary a second look.

they're low key - like it or not, cars send a message to those around you: a man over 50 in a two-seater screams "mid-life crisis"; a 16 year old with an Escalade screams "spoiled brat"; a caped crusader with flames shooting out the back of his car screams "Batman". get in a minivan, and most people think it's going to be some soccer mom or weenie dad with a passel of rowdy hellions watching Spongebob in the back seat. this lack of expectations works to your advantage in that there's no pressure to match the "coolness" factor of the car. since they're inherently uncool, observers are likely to end up scratching their heads when 6 moderately hip 25-32 year olds clamber out to hit the free pickle bar at Roy Rogers.

they're sturdy - should the unthinkable happen and you are involved in an accident, you stand a much better chance of walking away, even if you come up against some behemoth Hummer whose driver is talking on three cell phones and conducting a videoconference.

so give it up for the minivan. the wife and i will be enjoying one over the long weekend, so if you see us, give us a wave (if you thought i was going to say "give us a brake" go back 3 spaces).

Posted by Jamie at 05:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

i've just been given the list of Super Bowl advertisers, broken down by quarter for those who are looking to get their scorecard filled out early. no real surprises, but it's interesting that anheuser-busch is holding its reponsible drinking ads off until the 4th quarter. might be a bit late by then, huh guys?

SUPER BOWL XXXVIII ADVERTISERS

1ST QUARTER ADVERTISERS LENGTH AGENCY
Anheuser-Busch (Budweiser) 30-seconds DDB Chicago
Anheuser-Busch (Bud Light) 30-seconds DDB Chicago
Anheuser-Busch (Bud Light) 30-seconds DDB Toronto
America Online 30-seconds Wieden & Kennedy
DaimlerChrysler (Dodge) 30-seconds BBDO, Detroit
FedEx 30-seconds BBDO, N.Y.
General Motors (Chevrolet) 30-seconds Campbell-Ewald
H&R Block 30-seconds Campbell-Mithun
Mitsubishi 30-seconds Deutsch, N.Y.
Monster Worldwide 30-seconds Deutsch, N.Y.
PepsiCo 45-seconds BBDO, N.Y.
PepsiCo (Sierra Mist) 30-seconds BBDO, N.Y.
Schick 15-seconds JWT, N.Y.
Walt Disney/Touchstone 30-seconds In-house

Continue reading "pitched" »

Posted by Jamie at 03:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

on the heels of post-polvo snoozefest 2 comes these two articles on the love of mixtapes, debating whether the advent of the CD burner has helped or hindered the artistry involved.

salon.com requires you to watch a brief commerical in order to access their site. if you don't want to make that commitment, here's a brief summary of each side:

pro:

Today, when I choose to make a mix, I can easily sort through hundreds, even thousands of songs readily available on my hard drive. No more rewinding cassette tapes endlessly to find a particular song, no more hunting through piles of CDs and albums for that elusive track. And if I need a particular song that I don't happen to have, I just go online, buy it or find it. I don't have to worry about CDs breaking or getting too scratched to play -- the playlist is always there, safe on my computer, ready to be burned again. Best of all, if I want to experiment with a different order of songs, I just drag and drop.

con:

"On the subways you see people with iPods. They have, what, a thousand songs on them. Ten thousand, even. They stare random-glared into oblivion. [R]obots with shitty music taste and too much money to spend on music-listening hardware and shoes, in that order," is how Sal Tuzzeo Jr., a music writer, describes the phenomenon. Fewer people who are connected to the music they listen to translates into a less critical and picky audience for the crapola that the record companies and radio stations promote. The quality of music overall goes downhill.

while t.s.o.a. is not one to sneer at technology, there is something to be said for the linearity of a tape with its gentle magnetic hiss. the heartbreak of fast-forwarding really adds to the need to make sure that songs flow well and that you keep the crap to yourself. of course that implies being less adventurous in your choices and a lot more time spent per mix, so perhaps it's a wash.

Posted by Jamie at 06:14 PM | Permalink