"if you insist on blowing my bliss..."
when i was about 7, i was dancing around my bedroom singing along to Hall & Oates' "Your Kiss Is On My List". only i decided for some reason to replace the word "Kiss" with "Tits" (and of course changed "Is" to "Are" for subject-verb agreement). my mom overheard me, and needless to say she wasn't terribly pleased. i don't remember a major punishment and i honestly didn't even know what the word meant at that point. it was just a word i had overheard somewhere along the line. but i was forbidden from using it again.
earlier today, the once and former Hand-washings sent out a link to 23 homemade Hall & Oates videos that are part of some contest their website is running. i kind of wish there was a video of the 7-year old me jumping around. or else video of me and the wife dancing like fools to "I Can't Go For That" at Chris Larry's wedding - something that she just reminded me of. because stuff like that would fit right in with this collection.
H&O always had a certain cheesiness to them and no matter what kind of cheese you like, it's represented here. goofy premises? try #10. cover versions featuring over-emotive closeups? #11 got it in spades. needless distracting visual effects? perhaps they'll keep you from notciing the horrific dancing in #16. deep cuts + puppets? #12 has you covered. unintentional comedy? pretty much everywhere, but #5 seemed to go above and beyond the call of duty with the woman lip synching and then jumping into her PT Cruiser and then giving a kid a ride on the handlebars of a bike and then riding in the back of a pickup truck, all to a really bad song. you really have to watch it. or watch them all, really. it's all there: bad outfits, bad wigs, bad lip synching, women in drag, glorified wedding bands, highbrow, lowbrow, Stew "the man of 1,000 voices" and a whole, whole lot of instrument miming. you'll lose an hour, but it's a fun hour. a lot of it felt like watching a Mr. Show sketch (David Cross seems like he would make an excellent Oates).
of course, then you get to vote for your favorite and for me it came down to #8 vs. #19. 8 featured a non-obvious choice of song ("Head Above Water"), a keytar, and an apartment complex swimming pool. 19 featured two women in ridiculous outfits re-purposing themselves as "The Maneaters" and doing a decent job of singing the song while adding a few new flourishes (harmonies! acoustic guitar solo!) and dancing terribly. in the end i went with #8, so here is your t.s.o.a. approved winner:
Comments
My guess is you heard the word tits in Breaking Away, which is where I remember hearing it for the first time and also being confused as to what it meant. This movie also caused me strife when I called you a bastard one day before church and ended up crying myself silly imagining what sort of punishment this would lead to. Thankfully, my tears seemed to be penalty enough as our parents were more interested in calming me down than in sending me packing or forcing soap in my mouth.
Posted by: crispin | July 26, 2007 10:26 AM
#22 is also pretty amazing.
Posted by: mas | July 27, 2007 04:05 PM
I am a proud former member of the Hall & Oates fan club. I recall wearing a sweatshirt that had "Big Bam Boom" written all over it.
Posted by: Phil | July 30, 2007 11:04 AM