if Jackson Pollack was a gun enthusiast
thanks to some mail addressed to a previous occupant, i found the perfect outlet for all that latent aggression that i've recently been wasting on the morons clogging up New York City's highways and biways: Skirmish USA's paintball in the Poconos! to quote from the brochure in all of its prosaic glory...
"For the last 10 years paintball has been the fastest growing sport in the world, because it's fun and exciting. Its become so popular because people like you play it, ejoy it and come back. You will too. The adrenaline high, running around in the woods, doo to door village assaults, hunting and being hunted, the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat; it's all there and easy to do any day of the week....You arrive in the morning and are home that evening. In between you're a warrior, fighting for survival. From castles to towns to woods to forts, we have the battlefields to test you."
hello, corporate teambuilding! no, seriously. unfortunately, we've missed The Battle of Stalingrad (the Germans won), but have no fear because the D-Day re-enactment is right around the corner.
behind the scenes at Fort Skirmish
don't forget to hire their photographer to take pictures of your memorable day as well. and for those wondering "what's it like to be shot with a paintball?" the answer is apparently "[i]t's not gunna send you to the hospital, but it's NO Kiss on the cheek either!"
flex if you love paintball!