the shrewdness of apes

wild kingdom

have you heard of this before? the candiru? aka the "vampire fish of Brazil"? team t.s.o.a. physician Neal recently came back from Peru bringing back some llama leather and a great story involving Ayahuasca (in which an orgy and cows both play central roles...you'll have to hear him tell it). while he was there he traveled some Amazonian tributaries by boat and when he started talking about the local wildlife. as he talked about all the things to be afraid of he started describing a fish and i knew right away it had to be the Candiru. i'll let this description speak for itself:

It is feared by the natives because it is attracted to urine or blood, and if the bather is nude it will swim into an orifice (the anus, vagina or even - in the case of the smaller specimens - the penis and deeper through the urethra). It then erects its spine and begins to feed on the blood and body tissue just as it would from the gills of a fish. The candiru is then almost impossible to remove except through an operation, usually involving the amputation of the area. A more expensive option is the use of two plants, the Xagua plant (Genipa americana) and the Buitach apple which are inserted (or their extract in the case of tight spaces) into the affected area. These two plants together will kill and then dissolve the fish. More often, the pain causes shock and death in the victim before it can be removed.

[shudder]

now onto something fun. while searching for "llama leather" i came across this site featuring the neckerchief and caption pictured below which struck me as hilarious for some reason:

"Use on your llama, alpaca, or donkey that is for sale. Put on while at shows or public events to let people know what is for sale. Screen printed on cordura with Velcro strap for attaching around neck. Small for alpacas and large for llamas and minis."

that's a good way to end the week. we now return to our previously scheduled hiatus, already in progress....

Posted by jamie at June 11, 2004 06:15 PM